‫- PREVIOUSLY ON AWKWARD...
‫MATTY, I DIDN'T GET INTO SCU. ‫- I'M SORRY.
‫WHY DID YOU GO OUT WITH ME?
‫- BECAUSE YOU'RE MATTY MCKIBBEN.
‫- APPARENTLY THAT'S NOT ‫GOOD ENOUGH FOR GABBY.
‫SHE JUST WANTS TO TAKE THINGS ‫A LITTLE SLOW.
‫- NOT EVERYONE CAN MOVE ‫AS FAST AS I CAN.
‫- WHICH I RESPECT.
‫SOME THINGS ARE JUST ‫WORTH WAITING FOR.
‫[California I Follow ‫by Corsica Arts Club]
‫- IS THAT THE MAIL?
‫- THE MAIL'S HERE?
‫- I SHOULD BE GETTING ‫AN ENVELOPE FROM LOCKARD.
‫SQUIRREL.
‫DON'T WORRY, MOM.
‫SHOULD BE HEARING ANY DAY NOW.
‫A GIRL IN MY ENGLISH CLASS ‫FOUND OUT YESTERDAY.
‫- YEAH, I...
‫ORDERED A GIFT FOR YOUR DAD.
‫- OH, CRAP, GIFT.
‫- * SOMETIMES I CAN'T *
‫- IT WAS MATTY'S BIRTHDAY, 18.
‫TECHNICALLY, HE WAS AN ADULT,
‫AND I WAS TAKING A PAGE OUT ‫OF THE ADULT HANDBOOK MYSELF.
‫THE FACT THAT HE HAD ‫A GIRLFRIEND
‫DIDN'T MEAN ‫I COULDN'T STILL BE HIS FRIEND.
‫HAPPY BIRTHDAY.
‫- AW, A CUPCAKE. ‫MY FAVORITE.
‫THAT'S SO NICE, JENNA. ‫THANK YOU.
‫- YEAH, IT'S CHOCOLATE.
‫OKAY, YOU KNOW I LOVE--
‫- I DON'T KNOW, ‫BUT I'VE BEEN TOLD...
‫all: SOMEONE HERE ‫IS GETTING OLD.
‫- IT'S MATTY'S SPECIAL DAY ‫TODAY.
‫all: THIS IS WHAT ‫WE WANT TO SAY.
‫HAPPY BIRTHDAY.
‫HAP-HAPPY BIRTHDAY, YEAH.
‫[all cheering]
‫- THANK YOU.
‫MY GOSH.
‫- YAY. ‫- YES.
‫- BAKING FOR HER MAN ‫SEEMED A LITTLE '50s TO ME.
‫BUT I HAD TO GIVE GABBY PROPS.
‫IT WAS SWEET, ‫IF A LITTLE PREDICTABLE.
‫- LAKER TICKETS? ‫HOLY [bleep].
‫- TURNS OUT I WAS ‫THE PREDICTABLE ONE,
‫ROOTING FOR GABBY'S GESTURE ‫TO FALL FLAT.
‫- SO MARY TOOK UP WITH THE KING ‫AS HIS MISTRESS,
‫BUT ANNE BOLEYN LAY IN WAIT,
‫KNOWING THE LONG GAME ‫TOOK PATIENCE AND CUNNING.
‫- EXCUSE ME.
‫UH, MATTHEW MCKIBBEN,
‫YOU'RE WANTED ‫IN THE PRINCIPAL'S OFFICE.
‫all: OOH.
‫- SIR THOMAS WYATT'S LOVE ‫FOR ANNE BOLEYN
‫WAS OBVIOUS IN HIS POETRY.
‫HE WAS LONG THOUGHT TO HAVE ‫HAD AN AFFAIR WITH HER...
‫- YOUR SURPRISE ‫WAS SO COOL, GAB.
‫YOU'RE, LIKE, ‫THE BEST GIRLFRIEND EVER.
‫- GABBY MAY HAVE BEEN ‫MATTY'S BEST GIRLFRIEND EVER,
‫BUT I WAS DETERMINED ‫TO BE HIS BEST FRIEND EVER,
‫AND THAT MEANT ‫BEING POLITE TO GABBY.
‫IT WAS REALLY COOL, GABBY.
‫HE LOVED IT.
‫- AW, THANKS.
‫OH, HEY, I'M THROWING A LITTLE ‫SURPRISE PARTY FOR MATTY LATER.
‫YOU SHOULD COME.
‫- GABBY WAS CLEARLY ‫JUST PLAYING NICE.
‫SHE DIDN'T WANT ME TO BE THERE
‫ANY MORE THAN I WANTED ‫TO BE THERE.
‫WELL, I WAS NOT GOING ‫TO BE RAILROADED INTO THAT.
‫TONIGHT?
‫I-I HAVE PLANS.
‫- OH, NO, TOTALLY.
‫I GET IT ‫IF YOU'RE NOT COMFORTABLE.
‫- WAIT, WHAT HAD JUST HAPPENED?
‫SUDDENLY I WASN'T ‫FEELING RAILROADED
‫SO MUCH AS HIGH-ROADED.
‫- WELCOME TO ADULTHOOD, MAN!
‫YOUR ASS IS MINE!
‫- OKAY, SLUNTERDOGS, WE NEED ‫A NEW ROUTINE FOR REGIONALS.
‫WITH LISSA BEING SUSPENDED
‫FOR TRIPPING ‫HER TECHNICOLOR DREAMCOAT OFF
‫AT THE VALENTINE'S DANCE,
‫I'M RECLAIMING ‫MY STOLEN CAPTAINCY.
‫SO, EVERYONE, GET READY ‫TO LEARN A NEW CHEER.
‫U-G-L-Y.
‫YOU AIN'T GOT NO ALIBI. ‫YOU UG--
‫- WE DIDN'T VOTE YOU IN CHARGE, ‫SADIST SAXTON.
‫AND THAT CHEER IS MEAN.
‫WE ARE CHEERLEADERS, ‫NOT JEER LEADERS.
‫- YOU ARE LIKE A CHIHUAHUA ‫ON STUDY BUDDIES.
‫DO YOU EVER SHUT UP?
‫- YOU ARE LIKE A BOSSY BULLDOG.
‫DO YOU EVER LET GO?
‫- AAH!
‫THAT IS IT, GINGER-VITIS. ‫[screams]
‫- WHO ARE YOU CALLING A GINGER, ‫PERMA-BITCH FACE?
‫[both shouting]
‫- NOW, LOOK, ‫I LOVE A GIRL FIGHT
‫JUST AS MUCH ‫AS THE NEXT YOUTUBER,
‫BUT YOU TWO ARE SENIORS.
‫YOU HAVE TO SET AN EXAMPLE.
‫- I WAS TRYING TO.
‫WITH LISSA GONE, ‫I'M IN CHARGE.
‫- SAYS WHO? ‫I'M CLASS PRESIDENT.
‫I SHOULD MAKE ‫ALL LEADERSHIP DECISIONS.
‫- BOTH OF YOU SHUT IT.
‫I AM THE MASTER OF YOUR FATES
‫AND THE CAPTAIN OF YOUR SOULS,
‫AND I SAY YOU WORK TOGETHER.
‫HUH?
‫[R&B music]
‫[plane whooshing]
‫- ARE WE NEAR AN AIRPORT?
‫- [chuckling] PROBABLY.
‫SURPRISE!
‫- * OH YEAH
‫- HUH?
‫- NO WAY. ‫HOW DID YOU GET US IN HERE?
‫- 18 AND OVER.
‫WE'RE BOTH LEGAL NOW.
‫HOW COOL IS THIS?
‫- SWEET.
‫AND SOUR.
‫THEY HAVE A HOT FOOD BUFFET.
‫[bell rings]
‫- CHOKE ME OUT ‫WITH A CHEER STICK.
‫I HAVE TO TEAM UP WITH SADIE.
‫I CAN GET ALONG WITH ANYONE ‫EXCEPT MEAN GIRLS.
‫THEY'RE JUST ANOTHER LEVEL ‫OF SUCK.
‫- THE KEY IS TO NOT SHOW FEAR.
‫SADIE CAN SMELL IT ON YOU ‫LIKE BAD...
‫BRITNEY JEAN PERFUME?
‫- IT WAS ON SALE.
‫- FOR A REASON.
‫BUT YOU KNOW WHAT'S WORSE ‫THAN MEAN GIRLS?
‫FAKE NICE ONES.
‫APPARENTLY GABBY ‫IS HAVING A PARTY FOR MATTY,
‫A SURPRISE PARTY, ‫AND SHE INVITED ME.
‫OBVIOUSLY I'M NOT GOING.
‫- UM, ARE YOU KIDDING? ‫- NO.
‫- JENNA, GABBY JUST ‫THREW DOWN THE GAUNTLET.
‫BY INVITING YOU, ‫SHE'S SAYING,
‫"I'M SO SECURE ‫IN MY RELATIONSHIP WITH MATTY,
‫I CAN BE FRIENDS WITH HIS EX."
‫IT'S A POWER MOVE.
‫IT'S CHICK CHICKEN.
‫THE FIRST ONE TO FLINCH LOSES.
‫IF YOU DON'T GO, SHE WINS.
‫- WAS TAMARA RIGHT?
‫WAS GABBY'S INVITATION ‫ALL ABOUT INTIMIDATION?
‫IF SHE EXPECTED ME TO DECLINE,
‫THEN MY ONLY MOVE ‫WAS TO ACCEPT.
‫[indistinct chatter]
‫HEY, GABBY.
‫SO MY PLANS TONIGHT ‫GOT CANCELLED,
‫AND I CAN DEFINITELY ‫COME TO THE PARTY.
‫YAY.
‫- OH, THAT'S GREAT, JEN.
‫AND, HEY, ‫THE MORE THE MERRIER.
‫- YOU'RE SO NOT A JEN.
‫I THINK ABBREVIATING NAMES
‫IS IN THE INTIMIDATION ‫NATION'S BYLAWS.
‫- HOW WAS THAT ‫FOR A POWER MOVE?
‫I'LL BE IN AND OUT IN TEN. ‫I WIN.
‫- HEY, JEN, HOW ABOUT YOU STOP ‫BY MATTY'S HOUSE AFTER SCHOOL
‫AND HELP ME SET UP?
‫THAT WOULD GIVE US SOME TIME
‫TO REALLY GET TO KNOW ‫EACH OTHER.
‫LATER.
‫- JUST WHEN I THOUGHT ‫I'D HIT AN EASY VOLLEY,
‫GABBY UPPED HER GAME.
‫- BY THE TIME ‫I GOT TO MATTY'S,
‫I HAD PSYCHED MYSELF UP ‫TO FACE OFF WITH GABBY.
‫SHE MAY HAVE HAD A FULL RIDE ‫TO STANFORD FOR TENNIS,
‫BUT I COULD HANDLE ‫A FRIENDLY SINGLES MATCH.
‫[doorbell dings]
‫- HEY!
‫- I HADN'T BARGAINED ‫FOR THE WHOLE TEAM.
‫[indistinct chatter]
‫- THIS IS FRICKIN' SWEET.
‫WE'D BE IN MATH CLASS ‫RIGHT NOW.
‫- TURN DOWN FOR WHAT?
‫YOU'RE 18. ‫- YEAH.
‫- YOU KNOW WHAT THAT MEANS.
‫- ACTUALLY, NO.
‫- WELL, YOU CAN VOTE.
‫- NEXT ELECTION'S ‫IN TWO YEARS.
‫- YOU CAN BUY A LOTTO TICKET.
‫- THEY CARD YOU FOR THOSE?
‫- YOU CAN SMOKE CIGARETTES.
‫OH, BUT DON'T, ‫'CAUSE YOU COULD DIE.
‫YOU CAN JOIN THE ARMY. ‫OOH.
‫GOD, I GUESS TURNING 18
‫IS ALL ABOUT BEING ALLOWED TO ‫DO THINGS THAT COULD KILL YOU.
‫- ACTUALLY, THERE IS ‫ONE THING I CAN DO NOW
‫THAT'S PRETTY COOL.
‫- OH, YEAH? ‫WHAT?
‫- I CAN FIND OUT ‫WHO MY BIRTH PARENTS ARE.
‫I FILLED OUT A FORM ‫A FEW WEEKS AGO.
‫ONCE I TURN 18, ‫I'M ELIGIBLE TO KNOW.
‫- WOW, THAT'S INTENSE. ‫- HAPPY BIRTHDAY.
‫IT'S NO LEMONADE, BUT ‫FATHER SHERIDAN SURE LIKES IT.
‫- GOD BLESS.
‫- LITTLE...
‫- MM, PERFECT PLACEMENT.
‫WE MAKE A GREAT TEAM.
‫- TOTALLY.
‫GABBY WAS A FIERCE COMPETITOR, ‫BUT I COULD BE TOO.
‫I WAS GONNA BE ‫SO [bleep] FRIENDLY, IT HURT.
‫- NOW, SOUNDTRACK-- ‫I WAS THINKING BRUNO MARS,
‫BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT ‫WAS ON THE RADIO
‫ON OUR FIRST DATE-- ‫WHAT DO YOU THINK?
‫- MATTY'S FAVORITE BAND ‫WAS BASTILLE,
‫BUT I DIDN'T WANT TO SEEM LIKE
‫I WAS TRYING TO PROVE ‫I KNEW HIM BETTER.
‫WHAT WAS THE PLAY HERE?
‫I THINK THAT--
‫- I THINK THAT YOU SHOULD DO ‫WHAT YOU THINK, GAB.
‫I MEAN, ‫YOU ARE HIS GIRLFRIEND.
‫- I THINK IF BRUNO MARS ‫IS SENTIMENTAL,
‫THEN MATTY WILL LOVE IT.
‫- COOL, THANKS.
‫- YIKES, HUMMUS.
‫IF GABBY SERVED THAT, ‫SHE'D DOUBLE FAULT.
‫AND I WASN'T JUST ‫PLAYING NICE WITH HER.
‫IF I WAS REALLY MATTY'S FRIEND,
‫I'D HELP GABBY GIVE HIM ‫THE PARTY HE'D LOVE.
‫I HAVE TO TELL YOU, ‫MATTY HATES HUMMUS.
‫IT REMINDS HIM OF CAT PUKE.
‫- UH, THANK YOU, JENNA.
‫YOU'RE A LIFESAVER.
‫VANESSA, HIDE THE HUMMUS.
‫- FORGET THE HUMMUS.
‫I HAD TEXTED JAKE ‫TO GET MATTY HERE BY 6:30,
‫AND HE JUST WROTE BACK, ‫"WASTED," WITH THREE EMOJIS.
‫TWO LIGHTNING BOLTS ‫AND A BATHTUB?
‫- OH, MY GOD, THEY'RE DRUNK.
‫THEY'RE GONNA MISS ‫THE WHOLE PARTY.
‫I STILL NEED TO GET ‫SOME OTHER DIP.
‫AND WHO'S GONNA PICK THEM UP?
‫- RELAX, I'M TEXTING TAMARA ‫RIGHT NOW.
‫SHE WILL PICK UP ‫MATTY AND JAKE.
‫I'LL GRAB SOME GUACAMOLE,
‫AND I'LL STEAL A BOTTLE ‫OF THAT TEQUILA MATTY LIKES
‫FROM MY PARENTS.
‫YOU GOT NOTHING ‫TO WORRY ABOUT, GAB.
‫WHEN IT CAME TO PLAYING NICE, ‫I HAD JUST ACED GABBY.
‫GAME, SET, MATCH.
‫- FIVE, SIX, SEVEN, EIGHT.
‫GREAT FORM, GUYS.
‫NOW, FOR THIS NEXT PART, ‫I WAS THINKING,
‫"YAY, YAY, WHAT A DAY.
‫DON'T MATTER IF WE WIN, ‫AS LONG AS WE PLAY."
‫- THAT CHEER IS LAME.
‫YOU'RE BEING TOO NICE, ‫STRAWBERRY SHORT BUS.
‫- I CAN DO A MEANER CHEER,
‫JUST NOT "U-G-L-Y."
‫[gasps] ‫I'VE GOT IT.
‫N-O-T A-T-T-R-A-C-T-I-V-E.
‫NOT ATTRACTIVE.
‫NOT, NOT ATTRACTIVE. ‫- IT IS NO USE.
‫I'M A BULLDOG, ‫AND YOU'RE A CHIHUAHUA.
‫[cell phone chimes]
‫WE WERE NEVER MEANT ‫TO PLAY NICE.
‫- WHOA, I HAVE TO PICK UP ‫JAKE AND MATTY AT A STRIP CLUB?
‫I'M NOT GOING BY MYSELF.
‫I NEED A BULLDOG.
‫[Paris by Magic Man]
‫- * JETLAG, BEEN IN A STATE ‫OF DISASTER *
‫* EVER SINCE I LEFT YOU
‫* THE LAST TIME I SAW YOU ‫JUST FADE AWAY *
‫* NOW I GET LOST ‫TRACING MY STEPS BACK *
‫- THE BIG ENVELOPE.
‫EVERYONE KNEW WHAT THAT MEANT.
‫I'D WAIT UNTIL ‫AFTER MATTY'S PARTY TO OPEN IT
‫AND SAVOR ALL THE DETAILS.
‫BUT IT SURE FELT GOOD ‫TO FINALLY BE ABLE TO SAY...
‫I GOT IN! ‫I GOT IN!
‫- I CAN'T BELIEVE ‫WE CAN'T GET IN.
‫- NICE TRY, THOUGH...
‫SHAKIRA.
‫- THESE HIPS DON'T LIE.
‫BUT I DO.
‫COME ON.
‫- JUST SO WE'RE CLEAR, ‫I'M DOING THIS FOR MATTY,
‫BECAUSE I WOULDN'T LET HIM ‫MISS HIS PARTY.
‫I WOULD NEVER GO TO ‫THESE LENGTHS FOR ANYONE ELSE,
‫ESPECIALLY NOT YOU.
‫- WELL, I'M DOING THIS ‫FOR JENNA.
‫WE JUST MADE IT THROUGH A MINOR ‫ROUGH PATCH IN OUR FRIENDSHIP,
‫AND IT'S IMPORTANT FOR ME ‫TO PULL THROUGH FOR HER.
‫- NAMES.
‫- I'M CHI-CHI WA-WA, ‫AND THIS IS SADIE SAXTON.
‫- DON'T USE MY REAL NAME!
‫- WHY NOT? ‫IT SOUNDS LIKE A STRIPPER NAME.
‫- OKAY, LOCKERS ARE THERE.
‫DISPOSABLE RAZORS ‫AND BABY WIPES ON THE COUNTER.
‫- LET'S JUST GO GET THEM.
‫- NO. ‫STAGE IS THAT WAY.
‫- WE'RE JUST HERE ‫TO GET SOME GUYS.
‫- AREN'T WE ALL, SWEETIE?
‫COME ON, YOU TWO UP NEXT.
‫- WHOO, YEAH, ALL RIGHT!
‫THERE SHE IS.
‫YEAH!
‫- OH, MAN, I GOT TO PEE SO BAD,
‫BUT I DON'T THINK ‫I CAN STAND UP.
‫- YEAH, WHAT'S IN THESE?
‫[cheers and applause]
‫- THAT LOOKS LIKE...
‫both: TAMARA AND SADIE.
‫- WHOO, LET'S GO!
‫TAKE IT OFF!
‫- YOU TAKE IT OFF.
‫- HOO-HOO!
‫[laughing]
‫[dance music]
‫[men whooping and whistling]
‫*
‫- YAY, YAY, WHAT A DAY.
‫FIVE, SIX, SEVEN, EIGHT.
‫[men whooping]
‫- DOESN'T MATTER IF YOU WIN, ‫AS LONG AS YOU PLAY.
‫- TAKE IT OFF.
‫YEAH, BABY.
‫- WHOO!
‫- MY EYES. ‫GOUGE OUT MY EYES!
‫- THIS CAN'T BE HAPPENING.
‫- LET'S GO, BOYS.
‫- MM. ‫LET'S GO, GIRLS.
‫- SERIOUSLY, ‫YOU'RE COMING WITH US.
‫- NO, NO. ‫NO TOUCHING.
‫THEY SAID NO TOUCHING.
‫- NO, DUMMY.
‫GABBY IS THROWING YOU ‫A SURPRISE PARTY,
‫AND YOU'RE MISSING IT.
‫- OH, OKAY.
‫- * LET ME SEE YOU MOVE
‫*
‫* LET ME SEE YOU MOVE
‫[party chatter]
‫- TAMARA SAID ‫THEY'LL BE HERE ANY MINUTE.
‫- EVERYBODY HIDE. ‫MATTY'S COMING.
‫EVERYBODY HIDE, HIDE.
‫[exhales]
‫GIRL, THANK YOU SO MUCH.
‫I HAVE TO ADMIT,
‫I WAS KIND OF NERVOUS ‫TO ASK YOU FOR HELP,
‫BUT I'M GLAD I DID.
‫- NERVOUS? ‫WHY?
‫- [chuckles]
‫BECAUSE I WAS AFRAID YOU'D THINK ‫MY PARTY IDEAS WERE LAME.
‫YOU'RE CREATIVE ‫AND ALTERNATIVE.
‫I'M, LIKE, STRAIGHT ‫AND BORING.
‫- GABBY, YOU'RE NOT BORING.
‫IF ANYTHING, ‫YOU'RE INTIMIDATING.
‫- I'M INTIMIDATING?
‫MATTY REALLY RESPECTS YOU
‫AND LIKES YOU AS A PERSON.
‫THAT'S A LOT TO TAKE ON ‫IN SOMEBODY'S EX.
‫BUT I'M GLAD ‫WE'RE HANGING OUT,
‫BECAUSE I LIKE YOU, JENNA.
‫I GENUINELY DO.
‫- VALIDATION WAS COMING
‫FROM ALL SORTS ‫OF UNEXPECTED PLACES TODAY.
‫FIRST LOCKARD AND NOW GABBY?
‫I HAD BEEN WRONG TO THINK ‫SHE HAD ANY AGENDA
‫OTHER THAN KINDNESS.
‫FINDING OUT ‫I WAS WRONG ABOUT HER
‫WAS A VERY HAPPY...
‫all: SURPRISE!
‫- WHAT?
‫YOU!
‫[dance music]
‫*
‫OKAY.
‫THANK YOU, GRANNIE MCKIBBEN.
‫I DON'T PLAY BASEBALL.
‫ENVELOPE FROM UNCLE DOUG.
‫YEAH.
‫- SPEAKING OF ENVELOPES, ‫GUESS WHAT.
‫I'M IN. ‫- [gasps]
‫YAY-GERMEISTER! ‫WHERE?
‫- LOCKARD, BUT IT ‫DOESN'T MATTER WHERE.
‫I'M JUST GLAD ‫I'M IN SOMEWHERE.
‫- THAT'S AWESOME, CHICA.
‫CONGRATS.
‫- SO ARE YOU GUYS FRIENDS NOW ‫OR SOMETHING?
‫- WELL--
‫both: YAY, YAY, WHAT A DAY!
‫- SO WHAT, ‫ARE YOU GUYS FRIENDS NOW?
‫- EW, NO! ‫- NEVER.
‫- YOU GUYS, THIS PARTY, IT IS--
‫IT IS OFF THE CHAIN.
‫YOU GOT ALL MY FAVORITES.
‫YOU GOT GUACAMOLE, ‫TEQUILA, BASTILLE.
‫I MEAN, I AM THE LUCKIEST GUY.
‫- GIRL FRIENDSHIPS ‫ARE AS PERPLEXING
‫AS THEY ARE PLEASURABLE.
‫I SUDDENLY REALIZED
‫THAT THIS HAD NEVER BEEN ‫A COMPETITION FOR GABBY.
‫SHE WASN'T TRYING ‫TO INTIMIDATE ME.
‫SHE WAS JUST STRAIGHT-UP COOL.
‫AND BEING TRULY COOL MEANT ‫NOT JUST PLAYING NICE
‫BUT ACTUALLY BEING NICE.
‫THE PARTY WAS ALL GABBY.
‫- TO GABBY.
‫- AW, I CAN'T.
‫I HAVE A BIG MATCH TOMORROW.
‫- MM.
‫UH, JENNA?
‫- IT FELT GOOD, ‫NOT NEEDING THE CREDIT.
‫I WAS STILL A FRIEND TO MATTY,
‫BUT I'D MADE A NEW FRIEND ‫IN GABBY.
‫WELL, LOOKS LIKE ‫MY WORK HERE IS DONE.
‫BUT HAPPY BIRTHDAY.
‫- JENNA.
‫THANK YOU.
‫- ANY TIME.
‫I HAVE TO SAY ‫I AM PRETTY PROUD.
‫- OH, MY GOD.
‫WAIT, YOU ARE?
‫OH, THANK YOU.
‫OH, THANK GOD.
‫- THANK YOU?
‫- FOR BEING PROUD OF ME.
‫I JUST DIDN'T KNOW ‫HOW YOU WOULD REACT.
‫- PROUD OF YOU?
‫- YEAH.
‫- WAIT.
‫WHY DOES THAT SAY LACEY?
‫OH, MY GOD, ‫YOU APPLIED TO LOCKARD?
‫YOU APPLIED TO COLLEGE? ‫WHY DIDN'T YOU TELL ME?
‫- I DIDN'T TELL ANYONE, ‫NOT EVEN YOUR DAD.
‫- DID YOU TAKE THE SATs?
‫WHAT DID YOU GET?
‫OH, DON'T EVEN TELL ME.
‫I CAN'T BELIEVE ‫THIS IS HAPPENING.
‫- HONESTLY, I CAN'T EVEN BELIEVE ‫I GOT IN.
‫- WELL, IS THERE ONE FOR ME? ‫I MEAN, DID I GET IN?
‫- YES, THERE'S SOMETHING ‫FOR YOU, SEE?
‫JENNA HAMILTON.
‫- IT WAS THE SMALL ENVELOPE. ‫BIG [bleep] DEAL.
‫- I HAD SPENT ALL DAY TRYING ‫TO BE ADULT ABOUT THINGS,
‫AND RIGHT NOW I WAS FRESH OUT.
‫MY MOM HAD APPLIED TO COLLEGE?
‫AND WHAT WAS WORSE:
‫SHE HAD GOTTEN IN SOMEWHERE ‫THAT HAD REJECTED ME?
‫- JENNA, PLEASE TALK TO ME.
‫- GO AWAY!
‫- SWEETIE, I DIDN'T THINK ‫THAT I WOULD ACTUALLY GET IN.
‫IT'S JUST THAT ‫I NEVER GOT TO GO,
‫AND THEN YOU'RE GONNA BE ‫LEAVING ME ALL ALONE,
‫AND I JUST THOUGHT--
‫- YOU JUST THOUGHT ‫YOU'D WAY OVERSTEP
‫YOUR NONEXISTENT BOUNDARIES
‫AND INTERFERE WITH MY LIFE ‫FOR THE MILLIONTH TIME?
‫JUST LEAVE ME ALONE!
‫[knocking]
‫- PSST.
‫- WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE?
‫- I NEEDED A DRINKING PARTNER.
‫ARE YOU OKAY?
‫W-WHAT'S WRONG?
‫- I DIDN'T GET INTO LOCKARD.
‫- WAS THAT YOUR FIRST CHOICE?
‫- BUT MY MOM DID.
‫- YOUCH.
‫THAT'S CRAZY.
‫IT SOUNDS LIKE YOU NEED ‫A DRINKING PARTNER
‫MORE THAN I DO.
‫- HMM.
‫- WHOA.
‫OOH.
‫- OH. ‫- MM.
‫- UGH.
‫OH, CHASING TEQUILA ‫WITH CHOCOLATE.
‫I'M SO COOL.
‫- YEAH.
‫- YOU KNOW WHO'S COOL?
‫GABBY.
‫SHE'S SO SELF-CONFIDENT ‫AND EASY BREEZY.
‫I'M JUST NOT THAT AWESOME.
‫LOCKARD AGREES.
‫- IT'S NOT TRUE.
‫- MATTY, LET'S BE HONEST.
‫THE ONLY REASON ‫YOU WERE INTERESTED IN ME
‫IN SOPHOMORE YEAR ‫IS BECAUSE I'D SLEEP WITH YOU.
‫AND I AM NOT CRITICIZING YOU.
‫I'M JUST SAYING WHAT'S TRUE.
‫NOW THERE'S GABBY, AND...
‫YOU'LL WAIT FOR HER ‫AND DATE HER OUT IN THE OPEN,
‫AND...
‫THAT'S NOT ME.
‫- JENNA, DO YOU KNOW ‫WHY I'M REALLY HERE?
‫OKAY, I DIDN'T WANT ‫TO DRINK ALONE, YES.
‫BUT I ALSO WANTED ‫TO THANK YOU.
‫YOU GAVE GABBY ‫ALL THE CREDIT,
‫BUT I KNOW ‫YOU HELPED WITH THAT PARTY.
‫TODAY I GOT AN ENVELOPE
‫WITH MY BIRTH PARENTS' NAMES ‫IN IT,
‫AND I DIDN'T WANT ‫TO OPEN IT ALONE.
‫[mellow pop music]
‫*
‫WOW.
‫MY MOM DOES NOT ‫WANT TO BE FOUND.
‫- "MOTHER DOES NOT ‫DESIRE CONTACT."
‫MATTY, I'M SO SORRY.
‫"FATHER: DANIEL DURAND, ‫PORTLAND, OREGON."
‫- DURAND.
‫THAT IS SO WEIRD.
‫I COULD HAVE BEEN MATTY DURAND.
‫- * BRING ME BACK ‫WHAT WAS MINE *
‫- OR NOT EVEN MATTY, I GUESS.
‫- * BY MY SIDE
‫- [exhales]
‫THANK YOU FOR BEING HERE.
‫*
‫- [vocalizing]
‫*
‫- UH...
‫- WHAT?
‫- WE CAN'T DO THIS.
‫- WE ARE DOING THIS.
‫- MATTY...
‫- IT'S YOU AND ME.
‫THAT'S KIND OF DIFFERENT.
‫GO BEYOND THE RULES ‫OF HIGH SCHOOL.
‫- THERE ARE STILL RULES.
‫AND ONE OF THOSE RULES:
‫DON'T MAKE OUT ‫WITH YOUR FRIEND'S BOYFRIEND.
‫LIKE I SAID,
‫GABBY'S A REALLY COOL GIRL.
‫- YEAH, SHE IS.
‫SO ARE YOU.
‫- * SOMEHOW YOU SEEM ‫SO ALIVE *
‫- NEXT ON AWKWARD...
‫- GOT TO RUN. SEE YA. ‫- OKAY.
‫- MAYBE WE SHOULD JUST TELL HER ‫ABOUT THE HOOKUP.
‫- WHAT? NO.
‫WHY WOULD WE DO THAT?
‫- JAKE, I'M SHOOTING ‫MY SCHOLARSHIP VIDEO.
‫I NEED AN IMAGE CONSULTANT.
‫SO ARE WE READY? ‫LET'S GET THIS [bleep] ROLLING.
‫- I WAS SO GLAD TO HEAR ‫YOU'RE GOING ON THE TRIP TOO.
‫IT'LL BE NICE ‫TO HAVE A REAL FRIEND THERE.
‫- THAT'S ME.
‫ONE THING I HAVE LEARNED
‫IS THAT SECRETS HAVE A WAY ‫OF COMING OUT.